Self-Care vs Selfish
Self-care is not the same as being selfish. Taking care of yourself is necessary to feel good about yourself and to get stuff done.
There’s a growing trend around self-care. Lately, I have heard the phrase repeated, “Sometimes you just to be selfish”!
I’m concerned that the terms self-care and selfish are being used synonomously. They are not the same thing.
According to the Google dictionary, selfish means “lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.”
Is that what you’re doing when you take time to exercise, to enjoy a cup of tea, or lounge in the yard reading a good book?
I would argue that, it is not!
So why is self-care considered to be selfish?
There is often guilt around taking time for oneself. Are you passing self-judgement? Are you protecting yourself from the judgement of those around you?
Either way, the fact is that taking time for yourself is essential to living at your best.
The Heart Analogy
Think of the heart analogy.
The heart takes the best oxygenated blood for itself first. Then it gives the remaining blood to the secondary organs. If the heart was to give the secondary organs the best blood and take the left over blood, the heart would die.
In essence, when you take care of yourself, you’re at the top of your game. You feel good about yourself. And when you feel good about yourself, you have the energy to do great things. To be able to attend well to all the other events in your space.
To avoid taking care of yourself is to risk death, or so to speak. At least, to risk withering away into places of sickness emotionally, mentally, physically…
To be the best you, you gotta take care of yourself. If it helps for you to refer to that as being selfish, then use that for now.
And then ask yourself, “When I take care of myself, do I lack consideration for others?” Because, if you don’t take care of yourself, aren’t you lacking consideration for you?
We’ve twisted reality. To think that taking care of ourselves is a bad thing. When, in reality, it is the most important thing we could ever do.